Archive Resume @scottdover

Scott Dover

Understand to be understood

Christians do not see muslims as muslims see themselves. Others do not see christians as christians see themselves. What we lack (myself included) is understanding.

My goal in this life is to understand and be understood. But, I’ll never get there if I only talk to christians, or white people, or straight people, or men, or cisgender folks. The struggle, then, is being vulnerable enough to sacrifice your opinion while empowering others to voice theirs.

Until you you can walk in someone else’s shoes and understand their lives, your ability to be compassionate towards them is limited. Your ability to inspire change is reduced to contrived words falling on deaf ears.

You have to seek to understand if you ever expect to be understood.

Don't criticize the resolute

As I was pulling into the grocery store parking lot, I couldn’t help but see in the window of the local Anytime Fitness. Rows of treadmills filled with people, all resolute on losing a few pounds. In that moment, my cynicism started to grow. “They’re going strong now, but give it a few weeks.”

This attitude, one I’m not proud of, seems typical amongst people who don’t share in the ritual of making resolutions. I’ve always seen them as a goal where people go in with high hopes, only to realize that they’d never thought about the effort needed, thus failing to follow through.

However, I’ve chosen to rethink that, and perhaps you should to. It must be true that at least one person will begin a life long commitment to better health, and will add years to their life that were slipping away due to poor eating habits and a love of the couch. Someone smoked their last cigarette. Someone chose to live boldly in the truth of who they are, and stopped living a lie.

The truth is, lots of those changes probably happened on New Year’s day, but the decision to change our life isn’t limited to a spot on a calendar. Someone, somewhere kicked their addiction today, or picked up a new habit that will change the rest of their days.

So, don’t waste your time criticizing the resolute. Instead, applaud their efforts, because one day (but perhaps not on New Year’s Day), you’ll start down a new path that’ll change your life, and that time may be better spent without the judgement and criticism of others.